If I Could Do Anything Else

An interesting question was posed to a partner at my work the other day and in return, it got an interesting response. Someone asked, "If you could be doing anything outside of advertising, what would it be?" 

It got me thinking... of course, I don't consider myself in advertising. These days, I consider myself a lost floater. I don't know what I want to do or be, but I keep finding myself following two paths: advertising and comedy. Those are pretty good paths, I think. They're creative environments run by cool, young people with tremendous egos and big ideas. I think those are environments that I thrive in best. 

However... what would I do if I weren't doing this? 

Journalism, maybe. A few months into my first full-time job at a marketing agency, I applied for an internship at a Boston-based magazine. I interviewed and it went really great - so I got the job! It would have been unpaid and would only have lasted a few months. There was no guarantee of landing a job there. So, I decided to turn it down. 

Sometimes I wonder if my career would have been different. Maybe I would have got a full-time job there. Maybe I'd end up an editor of some sort and then leave, move to New York City and get a bigger job at a bigger magazine. Maybe I'd be living there right now, happy as a clam and doing comedy on the side. 

I still sort of want to write for a magazine. Maybe that's still in the cards for me. 

Otherwise, I have no clue what I'd be doing. I never thought much about anything except writing. That's the only real, solid vision that I ever had for myself. I don't even do that for a living right now - but it's a part of everything that I do. 

Sometimes I wonder if I do better in a corporate environment with set hours and schedules. I do like the structure, but I hate the feeling of being contained. I hate the idea that I have to be somewhere until 5pm (or longer) every day. Even when I have nothing to do - or I'm tapped out - I have to sit there and pretend or create busy work. All of that makes me feel dead inside. 

But then I think back to days when I worked and performed at night. I did nothing with my days. I'd wake up around noon, go for a walk, watch things, and basically just sit patiently until I had to be at the theater. There were a few productive days... but they usually involved a production process where I had to be productive and write sketches. 

So, you see, I'm at a loss. I don't what I'd be doing if I wasn't doing what I'm doing. I also don't really know what I'm doing right now. What a fun way to be!

Tomorrow, I think I'm going to start writing erotic novels for creepy people. I think there's something there.